MTV, Radio, and Indie Pop

Though it was not the first rain this month, but the rain coming down this afternoon brought some kind of memories. No, I'm not trying to be melancholic; it really brought me some kind of memories. I was downloading The Adam's Hanya Kau (Only You) when it started raining. Not heavy rain, though, but it was calming and refreshing, for it hasn't rained for weeks. The Adams is an Indonesian power pop indie band, formed in 2001. Their single, Hanya Kau, was released in 2006 as a single from their second album, v2.05. 

The Adams - Hanya Kau (Music Video)

The video stars Rachel Maryam, an Indonesian actress and model who has starred a number of films and soap operas including Medley, Sepuluh, Arisan!, and Strawberry. Maryam also has appeared in a number of CFs, including Jus Berri CF series as a girl who witnesses a man's suicide trial and attends a funeral of--surprisingly--a cat (it's a plot twist). 

Listening to The Adams' song on a rainy day, it reminds me of my adolescence memories. I moved back to Bandung in 2006, attending primary high school as a second grader. Living in Bandung, I was introduced to indie music. I also watched MTV on daily basis (and weekend is the happiest time I could sit and watch MTV all day long while enjoying my favorite snacks--simply being a potato couch). The Adams was one among indie bands I knew during that time. My musical taste was quite vast at that time, ranging from baroque classical to punk rock. Note that when I was in the first year of primary high school, I listened a lot to R&B, dance, punk rock, alternative, and even hip-hop as an extreme escape from baroque classical. I listened to My Chemical Romance (Helena, anyone?), Good Charlotte, and Green Day; I listened to music full of distortion. When I saw The Adams' Hanya Kau music video for the first time in 2006, I was captivated by how much more mellow music could be much more interesting than the music I used to listen to. I started to search for more music similar to Hanya Kau and the search led me to the joy of radio. 

I remember one morning I was watching MTV with a friend and it was playing Goodnight Electric's Laser Gun Electro Boy. My friend, Rahardan, called the music as catchy and futura-music, while I called it as weird and confusing (turned out I bought their CD in 2008 because I finally found their music catchy and sophisticated). On the evening, I tuned in 99ers and Electro Boy was played on-air. I was about to tune into another station when the intro of Hanya Kau started playing. So staying tune, I listened to Hanya Kau and turned out the playlist for that evening was Indonesia indie-pop. The station played music from The Adams, Goodnight Electric, Homogenic, White Shoes and the Couples Company, and so on. Since that day, I always tuned in 99ers and listened to what was new. Radio and MTV introduced me to L.A Lights Indiefest and I was so captivated by Kiss the Pain Away by Holywood Nobody. That was the song I always listened to in nighttime while doing my homework. Indie pop was soon no longer unfamiliar for me. It was like wherever I went, I would listen to, at least, one indie pop song. I love the ambiance the music created. Indie music has its own special ambiance that I could easily differ from non-indie music. 

So how did the rain bring me the memories? 

I have 'befriended' indie music since October 2006. We were having rainy season that month which lasted until April. On weekends I used to go downtown with my family. Sitting on the front seat, I'd tune in my favorite radio station and listen to what was played. I remember that afternoon rain was pouring down the downtown and I was on my way to a shopping mall. Kiss the Pain Away and Hanya Kau were played and I really loved the ambiance the songs created. It was raining quite hard outside, but inside the car I felt some kind of tranquility. I loved seeing out the window on rainy days, with indie music playing on the background. 

I think that's great. 

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Gigi yang tanggal

Kita tahu perasaan ganjil itu, seperti saat gigi kita tanggal dan lidah kita selalu menyentuh tempat gigi yang tanggal itu dulu tumbuh. Terbiasa dengan adanya sebuah gigi, kini lidah kita seperti mencari-cari kemana benda kecil berwarna putih itu pergi. Ada kekosongan, kehampaan yang membuat lidah kita gatal. Mungkin perasaan takut kehilangan bisa digambarkan seperti itu, namun lebih mengerikan lagi. Entahlah. Gigi yang tanggal dan celah kosong yang sering disentuh oleh lidah yang masih tak terbiasa dengan ketidakadaan gigi yang tanggal itu mungkin membuat perasaan aneh, tapi kehilangan sesuatu atau seseorang yang berharga pastinya lebih mengerikan. 

Saya tidak pernah bisa mengantisipasi perasaan aneh atau ganjil saat kehilangan sesuatu. Kehilangan seringkali, dan hampir selalu, tak pernah ada kabarnya. Kehilangan bukanlah aplikasi ponsel yang selalu mengirimkan notifikasi jika ia akan datang. Ia datang tiba-tiba, tanpa notifikasi, tanpa nada dering, tanpa getaran (meskipun terkadang tanda-tanda kemunculannya bisa terbaca). Mungkin karena ia datang tiba-tiba, saya jadi tidak bisa bersiap-siap untuk menyambutnya. Saat ia tiba, ada sesuatu yang hilang. Ia senang menyembunyikan sesuatu, membuat saya kerimpungan untuk mencari sesuatu yang hilang itu. Sayangnya, terkadang ia tak mau mengembalikan apa yang ia sembunyikan. Sementara itu, ada saya yang benar-benar kewalahan, tidak tahu harus melakukan apa untuk mendapatkan kembali apa yang hilang. 

Adaptasi tidak selalu mudah. 

Memangnya kita langsung terbiasa dengan ketidakadaan gigi yang tanggal? Lidah kita pasti akan selalu mencari-cari gigi yang tanggal itu, karena ia dulu ada di tempat itu. Bagaimana dengan kehilangan seseorang, atau kehilangan sesuatu yang sangat berharga? Kemana kita harus mencarinya? Apakah pengganti dapat benar-benar menghapus perasaan ganjil yang dirasakan? Tidak selalu, bukan? 

Saya sedang tidak mengalami kehilangan saat ini, tapi saya takut. Saya takut jika saya harus mengalami kehilangan. Saya sudah cukup lelah mencari dan terus mencari berbagai hal yang hilang dari hidup saya. Rasanya seperti memainkan sebuah pasel raksasa dan saya kehilangan beberapa potongan pasel yang mungkin terpencar di tempat yang tak pernah terbayangkan. Pasel yang tak lengkap, yang memiliki satu petak kosong, rasanya bukan pasel namanya. Saya sudah cukup lelah mencari potongan-potongan pasel yang hilang, dan saya tidak ingin lagi ada potongan pasel yang hilang. Mungkin saya egois, tapi apa salahnya melindungi dan menjaga apa yang saya miliki agar tidak hilang? 

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