Friday, November 14, 2014

In paradisum

Today would be the longest day, ever. Walking right beside you has never been this comfortable. Well, you know sometimes you talk too much and it bothers me somehow but now listening to you is a great pleasure for me. I don't know how long we've been walking but it's okay. I don't know either where we are going to go. Down the street we are going but still I can't figure out the destination. I thought you were going to treat me some pizza but this is not the way to pizzeria. 

Why is it so quiet today? Like.. seriously, there's no even any cars and motorbikes on the street. We meet only few people in the street and I wonder why it feels cold today, though it's summer. This is one fine Sunday afternoon in the summer. From where I stand, I can see the sea. Yes, it's there, shimmering in the sunlight. It's so magical, just like what you've said. The sky is so blue and it has never been this blue before. The sky meets the sea. It looks like a boy's bedroom wall for me, half painted in navy blue and baby blue. Summer wind blows softly like goodnight kisses on your cheek. It moves the clouds towards the sea. Oh, the clouds! You always say some clouds look like angels but I have no idea how come they look like angels. Clouds are just like cotton candy; they're soft and fluffy. I wonder how clouds taste. Are they tasteless? Or perhaps, bitter? Well, if they do have taste, then the black clouds will taste so bad. Bitter, as cough syrup. 

We've walked so far and now we are sitting on the dock, looking at the sea. I wonder what is beyond the sea, for sea is always mysterious, yet inviting to explore. Again the wind blows, then you get up, standing erect right beside me. Your black eyes look so wonderful, but there's something in your sight affrighting the deep inside of me. Smiling at me, you put your cap off and give it to me. There's something strange in the air and I wish I don't have to receive the cap. You walk toward the end of the dock and stop there. Looking back at me, again you smile and I see something in your smile--something that superstitiously hurts me inside. There are sun rays behind you and from where I sit, the rays look like wings attached on your back. It's so magical, yet I wish I don't have to see it. The rays shine brighter and brighter and they eventually become so blinding that I close my eyes. Summer wind blows harder now and it gives me the chills. It swishes, like somebody whispering goodbye in my ear. I hear the sound of waves and your voice, calling my name. Hiro, you'll be alright. No! That's not what I want to hear! Why do you have to say such thing? Where are you going? 

There's suddenly terrifying sound of explosion. I see it in the darkness--that great fire. Window panes break into small pieces. Small things can hurt you. The pieces wound my cheek and my neck. Where are you? Tadashi, where are you? 

I open my eyes and you are not there anymore. You've disappeared, just like that haunting picture of the great fire. In front of me, the sky meets the sea. It doesn't look like a boy's bedroom wall again; the sky has turned gold. Dark violet and gold, just like that velvet pall and the candle lights glimmering around you. I was wrong. I though only black clouds tasted bitter. In fact, white clouds taste bitter as well. One more thing: you're right. The clouds don't look like cotton candy anymore. They look like angels--angels that escort you to the paradise. So this is the end, isn't it, Tadashi? 


Aeternam habeas requiem

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